I haven't actually been doing so great.
I've been.... not doing things I ought to be doing, like maintaining my chiropractor appointments, or finishing that tooth of mine, and I'm finally doing a little better, so I'm back to maintaining that shit, starting over, paying the bills of neglect.
And, so, while you won't be able to make me regret putting off finishing my tooth for like, a year, because I left it in a state, and I'm pretty sure it's better now because of that, but still, fuck it all! The moment my dentist started doing things, messing around with it, in an attempt to finish this nightmare, it acted up again, and I am now back on penicillin, and in fucking pain.
I am super tired of being in pain because of something that happened 20 years ago. I'm mean, seriously, what the everlasting fuck?!
I am super disappointed that professionals are so incompetent. I feel like, at least I don't lie about my own shortcomings, but I am apparently the only one. It's so true what they say, about adulthood being 100% about "faking it until you make it," but I'm confused about when the "making it" portion kicks in, because all I've encountered so far is a bunch of idiots being really adamant about you paying their bills for nothing but inconvenience in return.
Ugh.
But yeah. This is the hill I'm climbing in an attempt to be better at being me. Which ties in kind of sweetly with the, "I see what you're saying, but I am not losing weight to appease YOU"-situation.
God, if I knew giving up on yourself/your life/your figure would be such a royal pain in the ass, I might have tried harder to be what people needed me to be. Not because I wanted to. Just because it would've been the least worst of two of the worst evils.
What am I even doing. Seriously.
I've been.... not doing things I ought to be doing, like maintaining my chiropractor appointments, or finishing that tooth of mine, and I'm finally doing a little better, so I'm back to maintaining that shit, starting over, paying the bills of neglect.
And, so, while you won't be able to make me regret putting off finishing my tooth for like, a year, because I left it in a state, and I'm pretty sure it's better now because of that, but still, fuck it all! The moment my dentist started doing things, messing around with it, in an attempt to finish this nightmare, it acted up again, and I am now back on penicillin, and in fucking pain.
I am super tired of being in pain because of something that happened 20 years ago. I'm mean, seriously, what the everlasting fuck?!
I am super disappointed that professionals are so incompetent. I feel like, at least I don't lie about my own shortcomings, but I am apparently the only one. It's so true what they say, about adulthood being 100% about "faking it until you make it," but I'm confused about when the "making it" portion kicks in, because all I've encountered so far is a bunch of idiots being really adamant about you paying their bills for nothing but inconvenience in return.
Ugh.
But yeah. This is the hill I'm climbing in an attempt to be better at being me. Which ties in kind of sweetly with the, "I see what you're saying, but I am not losing weight to appease YOU"-situation.
God, if I knew giving up on yourself/your life/your figure would be such a royal pain in the ass, I might have tried harder to be what people needed me to be. Not because I wanted to. Just because it would've been the least worst of two of the worst evils.
What am I even doing. Seriously.